I used to try. Now I don’t want to bother with “trying” anymore. You can call me lazy, but I’m really just tired.
I’m tired of a lot of things. I’m tired of trying to get myself out there. I’m tired of trying to make friends and still having people hate me. I’m tired of having a good relationship with my parents and still being seen as a disappointment. I’m tired of working hard in school and still doing poorly in classes. I’m tired of trying to get my writing out there and having nobody read it. I’m tired. I don’t know what I’m waiting for anymore.
People don’t like me. I’m annoying or irritating or whatever. It’s something that people don’t like. It doesn’t matter what it is. It doesn’t change the outcome.
I post a lot on social media. I make a lot of myself known. It’s because I don’t care who reads what or who knows what. At least people will know who I am. A pessimist. I disappointment. It isn’t a mood. It’s me all the time.